long-awaited Tuesday

okay, so i'm sitting in the goddamned ninety-one degree heat in a living room with two fans on me, wanting to die.

i'm typing these words in between hearing stupid fucking idiots driving down a residential road in a shitting four-wheeler.

my fingers and feet are swollen so bad i want to cut them off.

what do these three things mean? i'm in Cheyenne again! i'm in Cheyenne and i want to goddamn kill myself.

i always forget exactly how much Cheyenne makes me want to die until i arrive. until i smell that fabulous manure, see the moronic "goth..." things that run the streets and i can't go a block without seeing at LEAST one person i know. it is these things, amongst many others (the heat being the worst of them all at the moment) that mean i will never, ever be able to live in Cheyenne again, for the rest of my life.

the biggest saving grace has been my sister, who i will list about right NOW!

LaDonna... i love everything about her... the way she hoards amazing items, the way we have the same laugh, the way she smiles, the hugs she gives me, the INCREDIBLY deadpan way she can tell a fucking hysterical joke without flinching from her serious face and the way that no matter what, she's the biggest, most important part of my life, bar none. she knows more about me than i ever knew she would. we've developed this amazing closeness that i sometimes can't believe i'm lucky enough to have in my life. i love her so much.
respite from womb pain... you know? when you're writhing around on the sofa or bed dying and contemplating what spoon you would use to scoop out your womb? well, i love the brief moments in between THOSE moments where the pain stops and you can breath and unclench long enough to turn on your side and change the channel. those moments are special to me.
dolphins
knowing Booger went to a good home... for the second time in one year, two weeks ago, i had to give a pet away. it was SUCH a hard decision, but the instant i walked into her house with him clinging on to me like a baby monkey and i saw her tiny jack russell mix, i knew that i'd made the right choice. seeing him play with his new bff was really special to watch and despite how many tears i broke down and shed the instant i left her house, i know he's in the perfect home.
the Oscilloscope Laboratories opening
hatchet fish
Jeffry and Jack Lewis... who's music we stumbled on quite by accident but fell completely in love with immediately. i am the biggest lyrical hussy in the world, but when amazing lyrics are combined with cute, bouncy music, i can't help but imagine what it would be like to listen to that music constantly, for the rest of my life.
Bob Hope
when old, white drunk people try to swing dance
the guy who plays Candyman
Shaun White
the feeling of water releasing from my ear after a shower or swim
the sound of bacon frying
serial killer documentaries
Izzy and the Catostrophics
being able to sleep
when Muffin's hair is longer
talking to Carmen
cold water
hot as fuck showers
caramel
packing
unpacking
watching Roseanne with Muffin
croissants
Pepsi
lettuice
the first night in a new house
new kitchens... it's like traveling to a foreign land that you can make entirely your own
The Rock... the pizza place, NOT the actor/beefy stud.
guessing what makes up the flavours in foods... because there's a special kind of smug set aside for people who are as obsessed with foods and flavours as me!
lightening
seeing cats pant
being licked by a cat
the mountains in Wyoming
Camel menthol crush cigarettes
wind chimes
the sound of a cork coming out of a glass bottle


okay, i need to go sit outside! i hope this has been a satisfactory blog for all of you readers and i'm so totally sorry for going so long without posting! moving house and getting married and traveling are SO time-consuming!

<3

hey, TUESDAY!

well, today's tuesday and it's been a day full of caring for my ill husband(!), documentaries, womb ache and iced coffees.

my whole body was full of aches when i woke up this morning and hasn't stopped, but MY pain has been set aside for Muffin, because he came home on the brink of death. he's as hot as a cooling oven and now sleeping soundly after an hour of cuddles and head scratches, all of which took place during an episode on why sharks are perfect killers.

now though, i am relaxing in the too-hot house with a belly full of homemade spaghetti, nearly about to get a bowl of ice cream, but i thought a list would be in order first.

please, enjoy!

1950's tin toys... there is just something so charming and special about those little rusty trinkets. robots, rocketships, dogs... all of them.
the way Muffin puts subtitles on for me... i've always loved subtitles, since i was a youngster i've always had to have the subtitles on when i watch anything on telly or any films. i love to make sure i don't miss anything and the subtitles really help you to capture every tiny detail.
fat men on mopeds
slow motion skateboard shots
handplants
Shark Week
polka dots
drawing
garden gnomes... and also the fact that i am will be beginning a project for LaDonna that has got me staring at photos of gnomes in different poses and clothes. i've fallen in love with them now, completely. this project'll be wonderful!
surprising Muffin with cute things... like the fact that i made him a precious crocheted envelope with a few crocheted things inside. i like to remind him that i love him by sneaking special things into his lunchbox and wallets. 
shark teeth
aerial ocean views
seals and their huge, droopy eyes
cake and ice cream
Blue Bunny red velvet cake ice cream... which, can i say, is the best thing i've ever tasted in my entire life. go get some and change your life.
the little fish that suck on tiger sharks
big changes... which will be outlined in a blog to be posted sometime tomorrow, i should think.

eh, Roseanne's on and my womb's causing a scene, so i'm gonna end this. have a beautiful week.