Wednesday, 30 July 2008

dear hairs...

please understand that i do not hate you for being impossible with me. i completely understand that i have treated you quite badly in the past and can see why you would just not want to have to go along with one of my antics again. i know i have asked a lot of you in the past and i appreciate if you do not want to listen to me ever again, but i could really use your help.
last night you and i tried to have a date. not ever in the history of our relationship has a hair date gone so badly between us. i didn't brush you correctly and you wouldn't dry or hold any sort of pose long enough for me to photograph it. you know i think you are beautiful and you still insist on hiding that special beauty you have behind a mask of flat and dull horror after letting me see a small sneak peek of what you have to offer.
i don't know how much longer this is going to be able to work out hairs. it just seems like things are going downhill with us. i try to make you happy, i do. i have an entire cupboard full of bottles and pots of things i thought you would be pleased with but you still just hate me. what can i DO!?
please, just this one time, know that your help would be amazing. this will be the last thing i ever ask of you and then we can go our seperate ways. i just want to look splendid at the wedding. can you please help me do that?
yours truly,
'the head'

i just cannae believe how impossible hairs can be sometimes. in an effort to make myself the most beautiful creature for the wedding i attempted pincurls last night. i felt wildly confident in the beginning. i got them all twirly and set and put a little rag on my head to help in drying and generally looked sassy.

i left the hairs to their own devices for like, two hours and ran around the house, did washing up, pranced to the shop, snuggled the rabbit, ate dinner, watched hollyoaks and a bit of aladdin.

now, here's the thing. because i have the shortest hairs in the world AND because they are ever so thin now, i had thought that they would SURELY dry within two hours. i mean, the girl in the tutorial i had read said her hairs dried in two hours and she had the longest hair in the world ever. so, i take the first one out and am so pleased with the springyness that it has to offer that i take a seat to delve further into agraba whilst removing the remaining hair pins of doom.

well, it seems that that first one was the ONLY one who decided to dry. to make things worse, i did this trial run so late in the evening that i did not have time to make my hairs right again before bed, so i have had to attend work this morning with a bit of a frantic mop.
my hair is larger than it ever has been and i am not impressed. as i only put pincurls in the front of my head, it is huge in the front and flat as a wee english pancake in the back.
oh hairs, how i loathe the!

8: do you consider your childhood a happy one?

i think overall it could have been better. but i cannae imagine that there is anyone that had every single perfect thing ever happen to them.

i was generally happy as a child. there are obvious flaws that stick out, like my mum being disabled and therefore thrusting me into the limelight of the one man caring show. if i am being honest though, i could not have imagined anything else. i love the childhood i was given. i had a mum who gave me everything she could and loved me huge amounts. i had two sisters who, despite their ages, hung out with me and took me to waterworld at least two times every summer. and i had pets. oh my god i had pets.

7: talk about a time when you got in trouble at school...

heh, i think the most prominant one was when i was around nine and i was out in the playground with a kid called noah loetcher and a couple of other girls. for some reason noah thought it would be fun to show us his willy and he did.

it is weird though, you know? i do not remember a single thing after that until i was in the principal's office later that day with a pink slip in my hand. the next day being the one where i had to participate in 'lunchtime detention.'

lunchtime detention was the worst because it was followed through in such a way that one was forced to eat with all the smelly kids and then sit with their noses against the wall JUST within sign of the door leading to everyone having recess. worst punishment ever, no?

Tuesday, 29 July 2008

i heart things and things tuesday

this week is like, the best week ever in the world for hearting things. i have spent just the last two days in a big fat whirlwind of excited glee, trying to keep my feet on the ground but failing quite a lot. i have been running around with wedding plans and hen-night plans and rabbit joy and have forgotten to remember to slow down. although, despite my pleased-ness, i have been enjoying all things life...

  • the sneaks... this is the band husband played with on friday and they are delightful. the lead singer is a really young guy who looks quite a lot like chad from new found glory and he is generally really sweet, shy and has amazing taste in music. it is not often that i really enjoy a band that husband plays with. i tend to be quite protective about his abilities and how he goes about utilising them. it really makes me happy to see him playing in a band that he seemed to enjoy a great deal and that performs a genre of music that speaks more to his style of music than anyone else's.
  • my amazon wishlist... i have only just learned the glory of creating an amazon wishlist and holy moly has it been a fun experience. i really love that when i look at a book it tells me what other books that i would like for it to make friends with. it is true, i would like for all of my books to have their own BFF and if i can find something that is willing to help me in that quest, i will greet it with open arms.
  • angel food bakery... i am more excited than anything ever to prance into the little bakery on meeting house lane and buy every single cupcake i can find whilst i am there. they all look like their own little piece of precious and yummy art that i just want to consume as quickly as possible. i plan to march into the shop within the first hour of arriving in brighton and gain at least half a stone by forcing these precious treats to become friends with my esophogus.

  • getting tattoos... never in the course of getting any of my tattoos have i felt so chilled out and pleased than when i got my hula done on my arm. i had spent at least a week before getting it fretting about the impending doom my arm would experience and how little i was going to be able to sit through. however, going against my expectations, my arm decided it would behave and i was able to sit through 6 1/2 hours of being stabbed. in that time i took a nap and drank at least a litre of orange juice (which i have now deiced is much better than consuming an abundance of caffinated liquid. obviously, having a tattoo on the underside of one's arm does leave a lot to be desired, but mygod it is splendid!
  • changing jobs... it isn't until one leaves their current job for another that they realise how much they are needed and how lost the world will be without them. it has been so delightful this week to have the chance to see how much everyone is falling apart with the thought of not having me around to do my work. everyone keeps trying to weasle queries into me before i leave and it is just really nice. if ever you are feeling down or like you just aren't needed, quit your job. people will fall at your feet, begging you to stay.
  • our bitchin' hen night!! so, as you are aware, the hen night is fast approaching. the excitment has only been building for it though, in leaps and bounds. last wednesday i got a phone call from a lady at BBC3 saying that they are doing a programme on 'modern women's relationships with alcohol.' so generally, they want to send a presenter out to drink with lots of people with lady bits from all age ranges. one of the nights they wanted to attend was a hen night. well, i got a call and spoke to the lady for a while... after being so excited, she said that they would speak to the director and get back to us by the end of the week but she was SURE we would be picked as characters like us are 'virtual gold dust' in the world of television. well, friday came and went with no phone call so gem and i just gave up. until yesterday! gem got a call saying that the producers are going to come meet with us today and get the go ahead for filming!! OMG! so not only will it be the best 50's themed partay ever, but it will be filmed and aired on national television for everyone to pretend they are a part of!!
quite good, but not good enough for a real blurb... making your own bath bombs, galaxy chocolate milk, mini cheddars, stationary, the dirty looks one gets if they have tattoos and DARE to walk down the street, lush toner tabs, abseiling, post-it notes, tiny boy tee shirts, flipz, tattoo conventions, imporomptu day trips to birmingham, almost being finished with a project and having a big fat curry after a night on the booze.

Thursday, 24 July 2008

6: Are You The Same Person As You Were As a Child? Or Much Different?

i guess... well... uhhh... there are the obvious differences. i mean, the fact that i am taller and fatter. but like, when i think about it, i always had this image in my head about what i wanted to be like as an adult. a list of things i just HAD to achieve as an adult, as stated by danie ages 10 reads as follows:

  1. become friends with a tattooist and get a shit-ton of free tattoos.
  2. live in england.
  3. never regret anything.
if i am being honest, i would like to say that i have achieved almost all of those things... and this is how...

  1. i have indeed become friends with a tattooist and have been granted quite the lucky gift of being able to get as many tattoos as i can handle for free. to be honest, i never actually thought my luck would allow this... i never dreamed that i would be 'cool' enough to have a tattooist as a friend, but here i am today with over 16 tattoos and a big fat smile on my face.
  2. well, again, this is something i never dreamed i would achieve. but here i am, an almost british girl who is in love with life and crisps and curry and scotch eggs.
  3. more or less i don't regret things. i never actually look back and think, 'fuck, i wish i hadn't done/seen/said that.' sometimes i wonder how it would be had things been different but i never fret for losing out on that chance.
it is quite obvious that i am different from who i was as a child, but it is also obvious that keeping all childhood qualities is almost completely impossible. people grow up, see things, do things and that changes their perception and general stance on life.

overall, i am still a wee child at heart. i don't often worry about things like 'adults' should and i love to be impulsive and have no modesty at all. i exist for doing things on a whim and not looking back, which frightens a lot of people. i reckon this frightens them because they wish that sometimes it was easier for them to just DO things and not be afraid. gah... i don't want to go off on a rant, that is just the D L on my existence from child to now...

Tuesday, 22 July 2008

i heart things and things tuesday!!

oh the things i heart!!

  • Joe Delucci... OMG i heart this ice cream! not only because it is summer and if i do not put cold things into my body i might die, but also because it is JUST like coldstone, but italian. AND it is £1 a scoop, which fulfills my need to be cheap and full of yum yums! they have so many amazing flavours that make my tastebuds go 'weee!' and the colours of all the ice creams are just like little pieces of the rainbow fell into the freezer.
  • dodol! the parcel of delight arrived from malaysia last week and lived the wonder that is dodol.. coconut dodol. it is like the most lovely gummy sweet you will ever eat in your entire life x5,994,033! there were only around fiften pieces in the box, so i am having to savour whilst still sharing small bites with the people i heart.
  • breadfruit in all of its starchy glory. vic and i participated in an adventure to birmingham where we were lured into purchasing a breadfruit by a man who haggled the price down by £2 without our help at all. we were looking at them with wonderment when a lady came up to us and bestowed upon us all the secrets that the mysterious thing in front of us held. she boasted that it was best when roasted and my-oh-my did she roast breadfruit well! unfortunately, i did not practise the fine art of roasting... i boiled it and made it into a prawn and coconut curry. husband was more than surprised with the end result that depicted how little fail my cooking is actually made of.
  • crochetting! i have taken on the task of creating the bouquet for gem's wedding day and mygod it is fabulous! i have hand-created each and every rose and stem lovingly with wool and pipe-cleaners to create something that gem will be able to keep with her for the rest of her life.

honourable mentions are as follows...

coke, my mobile, my watch, having my teeth fixed, tattoos, flipz, aidan hawken, swapping internationally, chevy, having husband in bed with me, milk, teacakes, pierogis, cheezy horror films, dane cook, working, being able to be bossy, having everyone tell me how much they will miss me when i go, getting ready for the wedding, dying my hairs.


Monday, 21 July 2008

oh how you read my mind...

despite my recent and reasonably uplifting post, i have been sitting here feeling quite sluggish and generally poopy-pants. i have been trying to swirl my life up with a big sexy bath and a delightful session on flickr where i am sharing photos of things and people past. trying with all my might to remember everything about each of those things.

what better dish can fate hand me than to decide to send me an email via dailyOM which makes me feel all weepy and like everything is working just fine...

July 21, 2008
Remembering the Moment
Enjoying Life

Life, in all of its fullness, is happening right now. While our thoughts are sometimes elsewhere, beautiful opportunities and moments are being passed over and lost to the flow of time. And though we cannot possibly fully experience each leaf that falls to the ground, sometimes we get so attached to reaching our goals that we don’t pay attention to the wonder all around us. When we do that, we live in a world that exists only in our heads, while we miss life itself. There is so much to be enjoyed and appreciated that we need to remember to pay attention to the present moment, because it is the only space in which we can experience being alive.

We learn from our past, but dwelling on it keeps us from being fully present to life in the moment. We create our lives with our thoughts, but focusing so firmly on our imagined future keeps us from co-creating with the universe, so we might never allow ourselves to live our dreams as they manifest. It’s possible to be so happy and comfortable in our inner worlds that we lose touch with the business of life. We may enjoy spending large portions of time in meditation, or focused on our thoughts.

Life must be attended to, and if we are wise, we can enjoy it at the same time. We can awaken ourselves to the moment we are living right now by taking a deep breath and simply looking around. In doing so, we refocus our attention to our location in the real world. Then we can learn to appreciate the process of working toward our goals as much as their attainment. Balancing ourselves between the present moment and eternity, we can experience and enjoy the full range of reality available to us as spiritual beings living on earth.

how to have a good day/week/LIFE!...

i am a firm believer that if you focus enough energy on positive things and making yourself happy, you will live a life completely surrounded by positive things and be happy. i see and hear so many people from day to day who just complain and focus on the negative things that they have in their lives and wonder why they end up having shite days. i can tell you, i notice a very huge difference in days that are spent focusing on potives compared to days spent existing in the negative.

there are so many small things that you can do to make a difference on the days where the rainclouds just will not shake. ways to stop yourself on the get-go from having a crappy comment snowball into a huge messy avalanche of horror.

  • stop pointing out negatives in everything! instead, take the time to note the good things in an otherwise miserable situation. say you have been off work for a couple of days and when you come back your desk is covered with paperwork, your answerphone has been bombarded with angry calls and you have 20 emails... it is quite obvious what the faults are there, but what about the good things? 1: people miss you when you are gone and the work cannae get done without you. 2: you have a reason to ignore that one annoying woman who sits two desks down and will NOT stop talking about her holiday to spain next week. 3: you now have a chance to get a bit of overtime which will give you some extra money towards that holiday/couch/stereo that you have been wanting. you know, it sometimes isn't amazingly easy to find the positives in everything but a lot of the time, it offers you a special time to yourself to focus on the special little things that make life alright. it lets you chill out and have a breather whilst you just think about what you can do to make a situation easier and more ideal for yourself.
  • take on some hobbies to allow you to relax. a lot of times, people come home from work or school and delve straight into home life. they come in and start tidying or cooking or worrying about bills. doing these things straight in from work or other daily routines can really stunt the amount of passion you offer to that task. you may break a vase whilst dusting, burn your dinner or pay too much on the wrong bill. start doing things that can help you to relax and clear your mind... set yourself a timeframe that you can follow easily from when you get in the door that will be time specifically for you. start a craft or project that you can put a small amount of time into here and there, get a pen-pal or three and write them a letter a month, look at your local telly guide and find a sitcom that starts when you get home to sit and watch once per day through the entire series, start playing an online game that allows you to just play it once a day. the amount of things that you can do are limitless and with most of them, you will just end up with nothing more than a splendid sense of completion and satisfaction that nothing could compare to.
  • don't say anything negative anymore. so many people start the week saying 'oh my god, it's monday AGAIN!' **insert sob or banging head on desk** or go into a meeting or interview saying 'god, i bet i'm not going to get that promotion/job.' all that does it set your mentality to negative and buts a bit of a block on any posative things actually happening. it sounds a bit hoaky, but it is true. if you focus on negative things happening, they WILL. think posative and it will follow.

i know they are only a few things... but they are things that will make your life completely different. your general outlook and existance will be altered into a place that will make not only you happy, but all the people around you.

Tuesday, 15 July 2008

i heart things and things tuesday

oh the list of things i heart is neverending this week...

first things first...

  • this video... i watched it this morning as a link off of a blog i was drawn to and i almost died... it is just literally the most incredible thing i have ever seen from the actual video to the music. everything about it made me scree with delight the only way something can at 4:30 in the morning.
  • whilst i'm at it... the above blog is just amazing. i cannae stop going back and looking at it. the girl who runs it has the most magical thoughts and ways of thinking of things and it just makes me feel all inspired and squeaky inside.
  • Poetry... i have been reading a lot of adrienne rich this week and it has aided in my remembering a lot of things from when i was a senior in high school and performed a lot of her works for speech. she is just such a brilliant writer and i have just been sitting up late at night and reading her poetry out loud... i am doing this because i want to better my pronunciation and vocabulary... i have found lately that i have had a bit of a stammer when i have been speaking... this is a problem i have never really had in the past and i want to nip it in the bud.
  • disapproving rabbits have been consuming a lot of my at-work time in the last couple of weeks. it makes me pleased that other people can see what i see in the sassy looks that rabbits can give you. rabbits are literally the most judgemental creatures ever and can convey this in one tiny look.
  • beetroot. i have recently learned the glory of beetroot after several years of a very hateful relationship. we kind of bonded when i went to poland and was fed it in the form of maroon coleslaw, but mygod how does it make a salad come to life!! and not only that, i am happy to just eat it constantly... just straight out of a pre-prepared package. i am currently on the hunt for raw and un-prepared beetroot for homemade-crisp making purposes. everyone will RUE the day that i find raw beetroot as that will be the day i eat nothing but them for the rest of my life.
  • the ting tings! OMGee their music makes my heart prance. anyone who has not heard them, please go and look them up on youtube right this second, as they will make you fall in love with all things percussion and sassy blonde.
i could literally go on for forever, but i shall leave it at that, as those are the things that are sticking out for this week.

things to do before the summer is over...

so then, the last day of summer is looming... 23rd of september officially starts the september equinox and thrusts us into the Autumnal season.

because this day of official end of summer is coming up so rapidly, i am finding it necessary to ensure that i have all things done and dusted so as to make my winter the best it possibly can be.

the list is as follows...
  • find the perfect winter coat that features both a bounteous hood AND waterproof abilities
  • get as many squares done as possible to finish the blanket of my dreams...

  • start collecting patterns for baby things to make, as there is a pending bun to be in my oven.
  • make or come into contact with some excellent curtains to put in the dining room and bedroom. said curtains must be fashionable AND useful.
  • find the best and quickest route to my new job.
  • get both of my guns tattoo'd along with the rest of my left arm.
  • crochet myself a pair of mittens that might own everyone's souls.
  • make myself several pairs of socks to keep my feet from rebelling on the cold nights.
  • learn the recipies of some sexy soups for the purposes of keeping my insides warm in the evenings.
this list may or may not be extended.

Monday, 14 July 2008

how to look fabulous whilst being extremely disappointed

i have been pining again the last couple of days as husband has gone away for a workies event in telford. i hate hate HATE when he is away. i realised this last week and i still notice, there is no need for that ever-present spiritual guide to push this feeling further into my conciousness. i am aware that i have been taking him and everything he does for me and us for granted and i am aware that i need to make changes but it is hard sometimes. i have been going through a lot of ups and downs in the recent past and it is causing me to take a lot of evaluation of myself and what i am and want in life.

things have been reasonably on track regarding money and general day-to-day living. we have done a massive tidy of the house and i am really trying to keep it right.

i have finally got a start date for my permanent derby job, which is brilliant and i have JUST picked out a dress for the wedding, as the dress of homemade doom has won the battle of wills. because i am a hefty girl and because this is my first sewing project, i have decided that perhaps i should make something that does not hold something so importance on its successful completion as a co-starring role in a wedding. the dress i have decided on is much like this one, but is all black with an exciting lacy black layer over all of it. it is truly incredible and despite the fact that on a regular basis, things that do not have straps and i do not get along, it is totally rockin' with all the tattoos and my general shape.

this dress was actually picked out because the other (less important) bridesmaid is wearing the exact dress on the left but i am moody and need to have something different from everyone else! so i shall be prancing into the store tomorrow to invest in the dress of my bridesmaid's dreams and then try and match shoes with it that will not cost me my soul.

accompanying the dress will be a splendid and notably HUGE red rose that will be placed somewhere and somehow in my hairs. i have tried breaking this information to my hairs gently, that they will need to play nicely with the flora so as to avoid ruining the special day for myself and the entire wedding processional. we shall see what happens, although i do not hold very high hopes, as my hairs have been particularly moody lately and are most likely holding out for the biggest rebellion ever.

the disappointment which i speak of involves the previous entry's leading lady and her leading man who should not be her leading man. i am just always so shocked by the decisions that people make... when someone is burned by a stove, do they go back to it again? you know.... i will give them one time. yes, they can go back one time and perhaps get burned again but they most assuredly will NOT go back for another scalding will they? well, i can say that our heroin has done and will most definitely get burned again... she has done this with so many people and i just hate to see that she is just so... i don't want to say trusting, but i also don't want to say stupid... she is just naive. oh so extremely naive. i just want to cry when i think about how silly her decisions are... oh my lord jesus.

in other news, chevy is the most handsome man in the entire world and i just want to never ever stop squeezing him! i have been contemplating getting him a bff, who i actually saw this morning on a trip to someone's house who is getting rid of a wee man. he looks like so...

so i am on the hunt to learn if the young man would be able to integrate with the lard easily... anyone who has ideas, please PLEASE let me know.

Tuesday, 8 July 2008

i heart things and things tuesday and other things that don't have SO much to do with hearting

i heart some things this week. to be honest though, it would be much easier for me to be able to list the things i HATE. i have toyed with the idea of having a 'i HATE things and things' day but the first and last thing on that list would be that i hate the idea of that! i hate the negativity associated with it and refuse to ever let people make me lists of things that they hate. so, in keeping with the tuesday spirit...

Danie hearts things and things... it's true!
i heart planning and proceeding with a brilliant dye job on my hairs!
i took the wool out of my hair last wednesday due to the horrible amount of fighting it was doing with my real hairs and was at a loss of what to do with my hairs. they were blonde and looked boring and tired. then, lo and behold! i stumbled across a 99p hair 'casting creme' that made my hairs jump with glee and so i promptly made friends with it and pranced home to make my hair brown again with blonde streaks. i was suitably unhappy with said streaks of light horror, so i delved into the cupboard and made the pink participate and it did... BEAUTIFULLY!!

i heart tattoos!
yesterday featured pain and glee in the shape of a wee fox. for the last several weeks, when i would go into the shop mel would hassle me for another chance to hurt me. this is due to the fact that she has been taken on as one of the new apprentices underneath kevin. thus, she wants to offer as much pain to me as possible and i do so happily, as i am just SO excited to have an 'amy winehouse arm' this is a feat i have achieved quite brilliantly thus far, and am pleased to say will be progressing into a full on sleeve with time.

the fox was the new addition. it is the first of my tattoos that i refer to as a girl, which pleases me to no end.

i heart swapping things internationally!!
in the past couple of days i have had the intense desire to participate in communities that feature international swaps of crafting items, cakes, sweets and kwaii goodness. due to this desire... no, NEED, i have attacked livejournal and found a few willing souls to make nice with me and send me delights from places like spain, morocco and malaysia. the excitement that has mounted up due to this has become almost completely unbearable. i cannae wait!!


overall, it has been a bit of a stressful week. it seems as though every person in the world has decided to be as rude and awful as possible to me. i had a horrible pakistani man shout at and berate me in the street yesterday due to my tattoos, had someone i work with continually interrupt me today, had a man shout at me on the phone and the pièce de résistance is the following series of emails i had from a man today. the background on this is that there is a local community for trading and getting rid of unwanted goods to people who DO want them. due to the fact that i am incredibly into salvaging as many things as possible, husband and i are friends with this site. i made a request for a SEGA Mega drive and some scrap fabric, which prompted the following response:

Jack: Just read your 2 Wanteds, and not one please or thank you anywhere! I bet I'm not the only one to have messaged you about it either!

Moi:actually you are. thank you for being rude!!
i am sure i am not the first or the last person to not say please or thank you. i bet it makes you feel lovely to point that out to people. do you do that for fun?

You're calling ME rude?! I always use manners when I post a Wanted. You, however,didn't.
No you're not the first but it doesn't cost anything to say please, especially when you're asking for expensive items.

unfortunately, i am fully aware of the prices of the items i am looking for, which is why i am also aware of the fact that asking for them on a free site is not unreasonable. fortunately for you (and seemingly for myself), we are seperate entities and the fact that i have not said please and/or thank you on these three occasions (out of the approximate 20 or 30 that i have done... good statistics i might say, as very few things in the world today can offer you 9 in 10 chances of being perfect everytime) has no baring on you or your personal life.
perhaps you should worry about your own life, like how you feel it is necessary to contact a complete stranger and berate them with the thought that you, and your self ritious-ness is the almighty truth.
please, get a life and leave me alone.

exactly when your asking complete strangers say PLEASE OR THANK ill leave you alone.....

you should have left me alone to begin with love, as i am now going to have to report you.
it was not your business to come to me in such a rude way to advise me of my need to say please and thank you. you are not my husband or my father.
bare that in mind when in the future you want to harass innocent strangers.

i just heart how delightful some people can be.

alongside these lovely gems, our party yielded the information that chris' mum had to be admitted to hospital due to a possible heart attack. i told him he had to go see her, so he left and i was thus thrust into the lifestyle of a bachelor for four days. it was horrible and the pining chevy and i participated in made us want to die. the 'heart attack' was downgraded to a coronary embolism which, i found out today only ended up being gas. it would have been a bit of worth while had my pining been for a heart attack of embolism, but as it stands, i am disgusted. but pleased that the mummy does not have anything to worry about.

husband was pleased to be able to see everyone. he hadn't been back to melksham for two years, so it really did him some good. he returned today and i have been gleeing around the house in a big sleepy haze.

the biggest and most distressing part of the week has been to see that a very special person in my life has decided to make a huge mistake and allow a creature back into her life which has wronged her to no end. i have seen her do it before with another beast, but the doings of this most recent creature have slayed her inner beautiful straight to the core. i am so disgusted when i see her prance around with him as though nothing has happened. it is just like, does she not realise what she is most likely getting herself into? feck's sake!!

grrr! i has a husband to go cuddle. hooray!

Sunday, 6 July 2008

i STILL wish i was black!

Go to and type in your answer to each question in the search box. Answer each question with the first definition it gives you.

1) Your name: Danie

A mixed chick with a nice ass and a deepthroat who often hangs out with alot of Men who falls for her and she ends up breaking their heart for one of their best friends

Guy:Hey, you remember that danie form last month?

Friend:The one that you went suicidal for? Yeah i remember her. She had my kids.

2) Nickname:

anything that is good, or someone that is good, past tense to own someone

that is beast

you are such a beast

i beasted you

3) Favorite color: Glitter
The herpes of craft supplies; the thing about glitter is if you have it on you be prepared to have it on you forever, cause glitter doesn't go away.

4) What should you be doing?: cleaning
Action that people do when bored.
Involve taking a pile of junk and moving it to somewhere else in the house.

5) Name a friend: husband
1) Someone who has your back when you need it, but knows when to get the hell out of your way when he has to. Useful for fixing things, keeping you warm, and that fuzzy soft happy feeling that he usually creates.
2)Also, apparently something most of the previous definition submitters haven't the personality to attract.

1)"I love my husband, he managed to fix the toilet after it exploded and started spitting zombies out every fifteen minutes" - Random Female Victim of Zombie Attacks

2)"...In short he is about useless." - Well, I suppose you'd think that, being completely unable to attract a decent guy.

6) Hometown: Cheyenne
The absolutely most appallingly boring place on the planet. Known for its low population and high hick count. Lacks any sort of fun activities and external simulation besides the MALL. Also should be given the title the windy city instead of Chicago; "Let's get the shit out of Cheyenne before my brain explodes!"

7) Another friend: ashley

to go through friends like toilet paper

That girl is such an Ashley; she has had three best friends in two weeks.

What you are doing tomorrow: getting a tattoo!

Dermatological graffiti.

Facial tattoos always work out REALLY well.

Wednesday, 2 July 2008

i heart things and things tuesday (late)

this has been a week of hearting OH so many things!

CHEVY CHASE- the rabbit. he is just so beautiful and lovely and soft and i just want to queeze the little life out of him when i am holding him. i actually used to have a friend and when she saw a rabbit she would talk about how much she wanted to put it in her mouth and i always thought she was incredibly strange. now though, i can totally see what she meant. it is a strange compulsion. i just feel the intense need to put chevy in my mouth. and not just chevy either, any wee furry creatures. i saw a lady in town with a 10 week old puppy and i almost died and my mouth just started watering. it sounds really strange, but apparantly, the need to put something in your mouth relates to a lot of animals who protect their babies and keep them warm inside of their mouths. it is a bit of a mothering instinct, i guess.

AMERICA- the country, flag and food. i am particularly delighted with my mother country at the moment due to the fact that a big fat partay has been in the works for this friday. the butchers are going to be hosting a splendid little american independence day partay for which i am baking cinnamon rolls, an american flag cake (WITH blueberries and strawberries), making cheesecake AND devilled eggs. i have printed out approximately 200 american flags which i will be displaying all over my house along with a few copies of the declaration of independence. the excitement is unsurmountable.

1950's fashion- and the fact that i am TOTALLY decked out to the nines in said fashion today! i have on a beautiful and original dress with a thin petticote and my bowling shoes.

also on the list of things i heart this week are:
  • the fact that friends the movie is in production!! hooray for a 'sex in the city' for danie!!
  • sassy mugs
  • reading very old blog entries and being pleased about how far i have come
  • kate nash
  • Sympathy for Mr Vengance
  • potted beef

Tuesday, 1 July 2008

5: What did you hide from your parents?

if i am being honest, as a child i never ACTUALLY hid anything from my mum, she was just unable to find anything out due to her disability. it is an easy cop out and i suppose i could have been more open about certain things in my life that would have offered her more insight into my life, but it wasn't too terribly necessary.

a list of things i 'hid' from her as a child, in no particular order:

*my cat, hannible
*the sneaking in and out of dane nearly every night
*the fact that i occasionally did not feed the dogs
*how messy my bedroom was
*my stretched earlobes
*treats i bought myself with the shopping money
*the fact that i snaffled a reasonable amount of money from her from a small age

as i grew older and began to respect her more, i found that there was no need for me to hide anything from her for fear of 'being caught out.' more often then not, if there was something i kept from her, it was more to save her stress and worry and heartache than anything else. she was so ill in the last several years, so it was quite difficult for me to always be honest with her. some things i kept from her as i grew older are as follows:

*the fact that i was not going to be coming back from england
*the times that chris and i had arguments all the time
*the amount of concern i had for her


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